OPEN HEART

This post is long overdue !!

To lighten up the mood i will post one of my favorite singles and you can have a listen before i rant and rave out here as was intended by the title Not Soo Silent.

I feel extremely passionate about this post because i intend on pouring my heart out, and letting go off of all the negativity and the b*llshit that has been handed to me by some of the people around me. I will try not to delve off the deep end but i will literally have a war within me.

As an ambivert (which is a trendy way to say a mix of an introvert and extrovert) , i have both characteristics and at times one seems to bypass the other, and this is in  respect to the situation that life decides to hand to me. The other day some ‘critic’ decided to tell me that he can’t teach me how to blog but he can teach me how not to blog!!! I honestly took offence to his comment and in my head what kept on hitting me was that blogging is an individualistic approach to expression. Expression is necessarily individualistic and at times we need to be able to do so without having someone to tell us that this is right and this is wrong. I just feel that way.

Anyway so i have decided that i will be strong in being alone and i quote Mandy Hale, “Learn to be alone and to like it. There is nothing more freeing and empowering than learning to like your own company.”  this is my new mantra in life and i will live by it. Despite nosey people asking me questions and stuff about, where my girl at? why am i still single? how comes i am single? blah blah blah… i will let things play out on their own and let the cards fall into place.

So that is it, I will try not to overthink things as i usually do and be able to be happy with the decisions i make without letting others put me down.

M.A

FEELING

I honestly feel that either I am in a heartbreak or on the verge of a heartbreak.
And I don’t like how it makes me feel powerless.
I know being a guy and having to conform to what the rules are of being a guy in a relationship but we too feel.
Not saying that I am emotional and cry and stuff I don’t but I literally feel that my heart is in serious pain.
And trying to find something to cover the pain or heal it is difficult.
This is because I am not the type to drink myself stupid and curse out everyone. Or drunk call and tell the person that I love…I want to be with you every minute that the day has even though that would be absurd.
I can’t !!
At times I feel like I am in a pit and there is no way to get and no one to save me

REBEL HEART

My love for music is indefinable, in the sense that I would rather sacrifice conversation to listen to the 4GB of music on my phone. Well this is not always the truth though. Anyway the reason why I bring up my love for music is because certain songs through their lyrics hit hard at the opportune moment. I just had one of those mini arguments with my mum about the most obsolete matter, and trust me it’s repetitive and its absolutely absurd. Anyway I will not go off topic.
Lyrics are amazing, and many a times form a base of relief, joy and all those other emotions that we as humans are prey to.
My favourite songs change from day to day but there are those ones that stick and resonate within me.
An illustration is Madonna’s single Rebel Heart ft Avicii…
The following are the lyrics and a lot of people love their Madonna. I know I do.

As humans the need to conform and be part of this generalization is all too familiar , and wanting to be different rather to be unique is costly and dangering.
All we need to do is stay strong for as long as one can and try to make ones reality possible.
Keep one’s rebel heart strong . 💜💜

Some of the photos that I screenshot from yesterday that I love.

Kwaheri for now.
(being Kenyan Kwaheri is Swahili for Goodbye)
M.A.